K3

I wish I could lie and say that I'm ok, I kinda want to say yea it's better this way, but I know it would be a lie. I'm not ok, your disappearance didn't hit me like days later it hit me instantly, I rushed home thinking you are sleep reading on playing a game and all I wanted to do was lay there next to you and relax. But the moment I opened that door and saw that your stuff was gone my heart stopped, time froze and I wanted to die.

As I stood in the closet reading the note you left I was already in tears. My heart broke and I couldn't breathe. I read ever sentence carefully and I felt the happiness I felt disappear more and more. I couldn't believe that you had just left, I didn't get to say I love you or even give you a proper kiss. I felt alone and wanted to see you even more. That day I got nothing but good news all day long, and I wanted to surprise you at dinner with the news.

Why would you think that I never needed you when I did need you the most. You were my rock and foundation, there was never a time in the day when I wasn't thinking of you, I changed so much of my life just for you. I lost nearly all my friends just to be with you, I blew them off just so I could hang out with you at home everyday, I even dropped out of soccer just so I could be with you.

I changed my whole world for you I made sure that I changed jobs to your liking I did it all for you. If you didn't like one job I changed it for you, and so on and so on. You can think that it's a lot but it's true 100 percent.

I gave you the biggest decision ever and that was my career decision I was waiting on you, i was waiting for you to tell me when to go.

If you didn't mean anything I wouldn't have bought you a computer, got us an apartment none of that. I just was trying hard to make you happy. Because you were the only one I wanted to be with, just like now your the only woman I want to be with because I only have eyes for you. I love you with all my heart.

You never once was put second to anyone I always put you first. Love big I miss you please come back talk to me text me let me know your ok. I miss you with all my heart and just want to be with you.

You have it all wrong everything I understood your feelings for you and now since you have moved on I gave up my career and everything I held dear just so I can wait for you.

I miss you

I need you

I love you more then any man on the planet and in the universe.

Cj.