The most important day to me was the fourth of July (stupid American holiday) especially now, since I have never spent it with someone that I was in love with, (though I have been in love two times my whole life) and it kinda sucks after awhile. especially since I was engaged, and she left Friday which sucks cause it wasn't really needed I just got all this good news too. Anyway on topic, so yea I hate the fourth of July more than any of the holidays being tied for first with Valentines day. (which I now hate with an absolute passion.) It just sucks I was really looking forward to the 4th I wanted to lay in the grass, hold hands, kiss, cuddle, and watch the fireworks. I was looking forward to the next 3 weeks, Got a good job interview, got a apartment lined up I was coming up smooth. then this shit happens, what the fuck am I to do. I just feel lost and alone, and all I want to do is just see my wife thats all I was looking forward to coming home on Friday and she wasn't home, and now its the fourth the shit holiday. The I am alone holiday, the I am just gonna get drunk holiday to mask my suicidal tendencies. Life just sucks now ya know, I just want to be ok, not depressed like this.
Any way overall FUCK THE FOURTH OF JULY.
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